INFJ

As an INFJ just ask yourself do people give you energy or take it?  As far as professional vs proivate we INFJ's hold ourselves to the same standards.  INFJ's are also not overly emotional.  We have an easy time discerning what you want from a situation and what drives your decesions.  In fact we usually have to take a step back and not discredit what you want because usually others are driven by selfish desires.  Having worked in corporate America for decades it usally comes down to creating win win situations.  You get what you want as long as some others benefit as well.  Fairness, equality, compassion drive us and greed discusts us.

Our work personality is based upon our stage persona and not truly based on our true self whether you are being grounded or not. INFJ personality types can be quite ungrounded. Piss one off, see how that goes for ya. 

"I can pass as ENFJ..." To the novice of MBTI, I do think ENFJ and INFJ can feel really similar. If you had experience with the two types it would be easier for you to see the clear differences.

The INFJ is brave and selfless and desired by many, but desires Few. The ENFJ trys to be desired by everyone and is not brave. In comparison ENFJ is almost like an INFJ wannabe. 

INFJs always want to be alone. ENFJs never want to be alone and are wonderful but ENFJs are not introverted. INFJs pretend not to be but 100% are introverts. This does not insinuated they do not have a care for humanity, big difference.

Purpose of Comment: The test does not determine your type. If you cannot answer questions correctly because you don't understand question well enough or for example cannot read etc.. You will get incorrect results. 

Your real type is undeniable because the letters you get back for example INFJ equate to something. The something being a set of cognitive functions that have an order of desired use along with a natural ability/power potential associated with it. This combination and order give you a "personality type". Having your first two functions ordered as Ni/Fe will be different than Fe/Ni. These equate to clearly different things which is obvious upon research.

These functions determine your type. The test is just a tool for you to get an idea of your type without a professional to help you understand. This does not mean you cannot get the wrong result on the test, because for example you want to be extroverted but are not really and so instead of being objective you move it more towards nuetral answers etc..

LAST: Check your cognitive functions to know and verify your type. You are one or the other. When you understand more you will realize how incredibly foolish it sounds when people say stuff like "I am a INFP/J" or your own case here, "I/ENFJ. 

PS. No hate, I love ENFJs. One of my favorite types. Hope this info helps give some deeper perspective.

Hey.... so reading your comment just made feel like I'm not the only one who has a difficulty in finding people who understand me. Being an INFJ I perfectly understand what you're feeling, I'm presently going through something similar. 

But we INFJs have the tendency of being perfectionists, and that often leads us to be hard on ourselves. If someone doesn't understand you, it is their problem, not yours. Don't be hard on yourself for wanting to talk. It's normal to want to talk more, because you just want to be heard. I kinda did that these past few years, so I get it. But no one needs to understand you more than you need to understand yourself. You are the most important person in your life. You must always come first, you become your own priority,  because no one is going to do that for you. Learn to accept and love who you are, you are a unique person. Believe that, understand that, love that.

I probably went overboard with this rant, but yeah. :P

Speaking as an INFJ I observed that you go into great detail about youself and that should give you a big clue that you are not an INFJ. I mean this in nicest way but INFJ's realy don't share the details of thier inner world unless they can trust you with their very sensive, complex selves. Also, introverts  will reach within for answers and extroverts reach out. I wonder therefore if you are an extrovert perhaps? You say that you become talkative when others are not. In reality I am glad to have the silence so I can have a break from people and retreat back into myself. Silence is a wonderful thing for me and unless I am passionate about  somthing. I am reserved and secretive most of the  the time.  Look the world needs all types and being an open and expressive person is just as impactful on others but in a different way. Be yourself and celebrate you! Check out ENFJs. That might be your type. They are very simular to INFJs. 

Dear Abigail,

It seems like you have problem wirh understanding yourself and your personality. The tests are not 100% correct, they are just some guesses. Moreover, personality types are not fixed and they might change from time to time. So it is natural to feel confused. What that matters is not the personality type itself, it just matters that you finally understand yourself, your functions and the reason behind your behaviour and thoughts. All of these test are just some tools to give you a better idea of yourself, of who you are. So take it easy my friend :) You and the way you feel are important not the test results.

I admire your curiosity, your passion to keep looking for the true you. I believe you are not weird. But you are very special, unique and rare. You have the courage to discover your hidden parts and that is something the not everyone can do.

Finding out your personlity type is not enough to find out everything. Just keep looking with different perpectives and believe that you are on a right path, a path that leads you toward happiness, which is the result of discovering how precious you are.

Take care

I am INFJ-T myself, and I have studied the MBTI  test for a while. From the way you talk, you do sound like you're more ISTJ to me. I am not an expert in this field, so you might want to talk to someone professional to understand your personality type. But I do trust my intuition and I tend to understand how people think or feel simply reading between the lines.  

Yes i am the same. It's actually not bad at all. I know where you are coming from because I am a INFJ Too.

You know what's even worse? Someone who holds all the values of religious people, but isn't religious. It's so much harder, because non-religious people are normally so liberal in terms of morality, which is the one thing I absolutely cannot stand. I will stand for my moral values even if it means death. But then, I'm not religious, so I can't relate with religious people either. Sigh....

Lol!!! I'm a Christian and being an INFJ (unbeknownst to me at that time) was such a challenge in my younger years because of my inquisitive questioning mind, and not being able to conform with 'what's happening now in the Church' box. Translated I didn't have faith, thought too much, or just plain annoyed people lol! 

Until he meets a religious infj girl - another lonliest creature in the World... 

I feel you as a religious INFJ man.  I've been in a men's group for around 2 years and a small group for 3 years through my church.  No matter how hard I try to fit in, I just don't and get the, "wow this guy is strange"-looks.  Don't get me started on Sunday School class......

The prophets in Abrahamic religions are very lonely because they are male and they are INFJs.

Religious infj girl and over thinks everything

Why do you feel that way?

Hey I feel the same. I'm still recovering from my covert narcissist ex and bcs of of the fact that I people please and wasn't that good at conflict resolving (most things were apparently my daily and ofc I took all the blame)... I wasn't strong enough to fight for myself and as a result, I was gaslighted and manipulated. When I learned more about myself and realised that I wasn't the toxic one and started changing, my ex became more miserable and disposed of me when I was looking for answers. It's hard to accept the reality. Only look inwards to make sure you learn and don't fall for another narcissist again and so you can run ASAP. Don't hold onto any good that you see in such people too as it'll cloud your intuition and judgment, you have to be a bit selfish and say no before they drag you down with them

I would have to think that we are better off with people simalr to us. We get into our own heads far too much. We long for understanding- But the only people who can understand us seem to be ourselves.

Your experience is quite similar to me. I want to leave my job of 10+ years as well. Did you leave after you got another job or are you still looking for another job now? What job do you think is more suitable for you?

This job stresses me too much that I want to leave immediately but I'm not sure I can find a job that suits me, esp in this pandemic situstion.

Your experience is quite similar to me. I want to leave my job of 10+ years as well. Did you leave after you got another job or are you still looking for another job now? What job do you think is more suitable for you?

This job stresses me too much that I want to leave immediately but I'm not sure I can find a job that suits me, esp in this pandemic situstion.

I get it, Melissa.  I've twice had to leave jobs that I believed were unethical.  The misery and stress it causes isn't worth it.  The relief on that last day when you walk away, knowing you'll never have to return is so liberating - like a ton of weight being lifted off your shoulders.   I hope you found a job that gives you satisfaction. X

I relate 100% I loved reading your post! And yes! God always understands us perfectly and is always there! :)  <3 

Hey, I just read your experiences with and thoughts on being an INFJ and were just like yes! Even as a woman I could very much recognise myself in all of your six points. I'm also a christian INFJ, which can essentiate the feeling of alienation that you mentioned earlier even further. The last part and bibleverse was very encouraging, so if you ever even read this I guess I'd just want to thank you for your open, kind and hopeful words and let you know that there's other people out here that think, feel and experiences very much the same. God bless. [Sorry for any grammatic errors, I'm Swedish] :) 

I just found out that I'm an INFJ! Wow...has this new world of understanding things just opened up. I can relate to about 90% of what you've mentioned, with the biggest difference being rooted (I'm sure) in that I'm female. I'll elaborate in the same order you listed yours. 
 

1. My issue with emotions isn't in being sensitive to how I feel, but rather being overly sensitive to the feelings of everyone around me. Actually, I've been doing it for so long that it takes a great deal of effort for me to know how I really feel about something. In many ways, this makes me feel like I'm not "woman enough" because I'm not personally as sensitive as others think I should be. However, I feel good about the fact that I can nurture my friends and others in intimate ways that they can't get from other personality types. 
 

2. I feel different too. I have many different friends from wildly different circles. Most of the time I appear to mesh really well with them, but that's only because I'm super skilled at either tapping into a certain part of my own personality or adapting to the environment. I'm not sure that I've ever felt I could be utterly and completely 100% myself with any one of my friends. There always seems to be a reservation. 🤔

3. You are very interesting! I don't struggle with low self-esteem. At least I'm pretty sure I don't. I have always been confident in the attributes that I have for as long as I remember. I know that I'm beautiful, hard-working, gentle-hearted, etc., but I'm still always looking to improve or get better. It's not a negative though. You mentioned God later in your post. I think my confidence is almost entirely rooted in my knowledge that I am His and that I was made exactly the way I should be. I remember reading this book as a young child titled "I'm Glad I'm Me." I've learned to love me unconditionally, and so any changes or upgrades I look forward to and strive for are just ways for me to grow. I don't need fixing- you don't need fixing either. I'm intruigued by this feeling you have that you're special; I feel like I have the same one. 
 

4. It's just you! Lol, just kidding. I can't speak for others, but for myself, I was built for luxury and class. I find it really funny because I certainly wasn't born into it. Although, being raised at the poverty line has certainly provided creative opportunity and an appreciation for beautiful and quality things. So my style is a combination of grunge and class if that makes any sense. Black is my favourite colour (I know it's a shade 😒) and I prefer a gothic or punky look, but it's always pretty and sometimes (I dare say..) elegant. I'll call it Pretty Punk haha. 
 

5. You're totally right in my opinion. I actually didn't know this about myself until recently. Or at least I didn't know it was a personality trait to be adaptive; I just always thought I was being a 'different part of myself.' But, as evidenced by the various text messaging threads I've revisited on my phone, I change who I am or how I communicate based on who I'm talking to. Lol, I might even be doing it now! (I don't think so in all honesty....I feel like you might understand real me.) But now that I've realized this, I wonder how much of my adaptations I've taken on and assumed to be me? I'm currently doing some soul searching, so hopefully I'll find an answer soon. 
 

6. I didn't realize that I've need a vacation from being extraverted at times until you mentioned it. In fact, I also didn't know that I was an introvert until two days ago. I think that due to a traumatic childhood I learned how to adapt quickly to my situation, and the coping skills stuck. So I've always thought being around people helped me feel better, when really it's probably a combination of my extreme empathy for others that makes me feel useful and my familiarity with chaos that made me think I was supposed to feel exhausted after spending time with others. Anyway, now I understand my valleys after being overstimulated and feel less guilty about not texting someone back right away. 
 

Haha, leave it to an INFJ to type an encouraging message at the end of their post! It's such an important reminder though; for everyone. That we are wonderfully made! And that our differences- our weaknesses, strengths, struggles, and triumphs- No matter what personality type we may have or what our experiences may be, that you are good enough just the way you are and you have purpose! God doesn't only accept our flaws, He created us with them! He doesn't want us to be perfect, but rather to grow. And without inadequacies, we wouldn't have room to explore our potentials. So the flaws are a gift :) 

Suddenly, Jeremiah 29:11 comes to mind. Thanks for the reminder of the verse you listed. I've wanted to get it printed on the back of a sweater for work for awhile now. Thought it would be rather encouraging in a hospital setting. ☺️

I agree with a lot of what you say and experienced nearly all the same things. But I would be interested to know what you and any others think about being labeled an introvert. Most people, including my own family, would classify me as an introvert. I very strongly think I am a very empathic ambivert. Some might refer to this as being an extroverted introvert. I agree on a lot with being an INFJ, but find myself in a lot of gray areas the world as a whole doesn't seem to understand or being flexible enough to care about.

Yes!! Thank you so much for your post! I completely agree with everything you said. My friends often are surprised to hear I'm an introvert because of how adaptable I am to my surroundings and the people around me. I can be the life at the party for a few hours and then be completely exhausted afterwards. Bringing different circles of friends together is so overwhelming for me because of how different I am with each group of friends that I have! And it can be hard having so many friends yet feeling like nobody really understands you. I feel that way often. 

Hi Ryan I can totally relate to what you're saying. I just confirmed am an INFJ about a month ago and been reading all the content about us all through. I wish someone had told me that I am normal and I don't need to try be like other people to fit in. But I believe that if I master myself enough I can be more content with who I am. 

Wow. I read this and felt it was so spot on with how I view my own life, both the positive and negative aspects. It's so refreshing to come across other people with similar outlooks on life as I always felt like such an outsider. Thanks for sharing this Ryan!

I'm an infj grom argentina and I totally agree with you excep for the part of God... I was wondering how it would be being a male infj with sll our particular sensitivity. 

Wow man, It's like you are in my mind, I can feel everything you said. Thank you, really thank you, I can feel less weird right now (HAHAHAHAHA).

I agree with all of this especially the low self-esteem. I've been told I'm an attractive girl but I don't see myself that way. People tend to stare at me or talk to me when I just go to the grocery store and it makes me super uncomfortable. I just want to be invisible and get through my day without anyone noticing me. I wear hats... like every day. Big floppy felt hats in the Winter and fedoras in the Summer. People comment on how trendy/classy I look but it's really so that I can partially hide and thus face the world with any sort of confidence. Anyway, totally needed to read this right now. God IS proud. I freaking love you! Ha! Thank you for writing this. 

Every point was on point with how i feel in literally EVERY situation... it like were the same lol

Just want to say, what you wrote is a spot on reflection of my own personality hahaha.. I practically experience the same things and into the same things too,haha ha it's sooo weird reading about someone else that views the world the same as me. Anyway thanks for your words. They just made my day bro.👍

Hey Dude. You are not the only one.. btw what a wonderful explanation.. i think you are one of us... welcome to the INFJ's World of Up's and Down's haha xd...

Hi Ryan. Many of your experiences of being an INFJ sound familiar. As I was reading your post, with your comments about feelings awkward sometimes as a guy and being an INFJ and mentioning that you were filming something,  I thought of Steven Spielberg whom I believe seems like an INFJ. There is an HBO documentary on his filmmaking with bits of interviews with him describing his feelings of great sensitivity with his parents’ divorce and his drive to create a world of his making through film. He also surrounds himself with a core group of highly creative, talented people who totally get him. This documentary made me believe that there is indeed a successful path for INFJ’s if we believe in ourselves, set high goals and surround ourselves with others of like mind/heart.

i too find great comfort in knowing that God knew me first and always loves me and cares for me. All the best to you .

I feel exactly all those same things, Ryan. Great description in every way. And I LOVE the song High Hopes--it really gets me fired up!! Thanks for the Bible verse. God is who I turn to when I feel misunderstood, which is most of the time. I wish you all the best! Thanks for posting.