INFJ
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INFJ Strengths

Practical insight. Some people are visionaries while others are down-to-earth problem solvers, but INFJs manage to straddle the line between both identities—and they usually succeed masterfully. INFJs are insightful thinkers who see through situations and people effectively and enjoy developing practical strategies for action. 

Compassion. As a Feeling type, you might expect an INFJ to show compassion—but what sets them apart is that their empathy comes with a sharp intuitive edge. They are quick to recognize worry and unhappiness in friends and loved ones, even when outward signs of distress are not visible to others. INFJs are uniquely capable of detecting unspoken and unacknowledged suffering, and are called into action by their instinctive ability to see beneath the surface.

Keeping the peace. Mediating disputes is hard work, but INFJs have an astounding ability to help heal the rifts that divide people. They intuitively sense the real suffering that anger can cause if left to fester, and because they are good listeners they are quite effective at helping warring parties find workable solutions that will satisfy the needs of all. And they do it with great energy and determination.

Decisiveness. For INFJs, obstacles exist to be overcome and no problem can outmatch the strength and resilience that these types possess deep inside. INFJs follow through on their ideas with conviction, and have the willpower and decisiveness necessary to see projects through to the end. INFJs live for the opportunity to solve problems and bring about positive change in the world.

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INFJ Weaknesses

Overlooking details. No matter how practically-oriented they aspire to be, INFJs have a tendency to get so caught up in theorizing the big picture that they forget to account for some of the precious details that can separate success from failure. Details always matter, and while INFJs may recognize this in principle, in practice they aren’t always as diligent about the small stuff as they should be. 

Intensely private. Despite their loving and sensitive natures, INFJs have a tendency to close themselves off from the world and don’t give people the chance to know them or see the wonderful qualities they possess. Even in their relations with family and trusted friends, INFJs can be enigmatic. When they are feeling frustrated or introspective, they may retreat from social contact without so much as a word of explanation, which can throw others for a loop.

Conflict averse. INFJs dislike conflict intensely and will usually intervene to stop it, but this is one area where their perspective can get distorted. INFJs often fail to recognize that conflict can actually serve a useful purpose, allowing a good process of give-and-take to be established and giving all parties the opportunity to resolve their problem forever. INFJs would be wise to acknowledge the value of open and honest dialogue, instead of automatically assuming that all squabbling is harmful.

Sensitive. Once an INFJ has made up their mind, they tend to be very confident in their conclusions and may not have much tolerance for those who continue to dissent. When someone challenges their conclusions, they can react very strongly and are especially vulnerable to criticism.

INFJ Growth and Development

In order to reach their full potential, INFJs should:

Question their intuition. INFJs have outstanding instincts for the most part, but sometimes their intuition betrays them when they are dealing with others. When something is bothering them, INFJs will often withdraw into the safety of their own heads rather than speaking openly about what they are feeling; conversely, they seldom express their feelings of love, affection and appreciation as directly as might be expected given the depth of the emotions they experience. To improve their communication habits, INFJs should go out of their way to share their feelings—both good and bad—with others regardless of how uncomfortable it makes them feel to do so. 

Give others the benefit of the doubt. INFJs are insightful, instinctive and persuasive. But despite the enormous effort that INFJs invest in developing and selling their concepts and ideas, sometimes dissidents will remain. INFJs sometimes become disenchanted with those who refuse to accept their conclusions, and they will convince themselves that their opponents have hidden agendas and are acting in bad faith. When situations like this arise, INFJs should try to accept that total consensus is impossible and that some will continue to hold contrary viewpoints. In situations like this, both sides should simply agree to disagree and move on. 

Let others agree to disagree, too. When tensions are high and arguments are heated, INFJs will do all they can to restore lost cohesion and tranquility. But their love of harmony and aversion to division is so powerful that INFJs refuse to accept that sometimes the best way to end disputes is to bring them out into the open, where bridges of understanding can be built. On balance, INFJs’ dislike of conflict is a good thing. But their efforts to play peacemaker might be more successful if they would concentrate on keeping the lines of communication open when disagreements arise instead of always trying to sweep everything under the rug. 

Make connections with extraverts. Because sharing with anyone outside a small trusted circle goes against their instincts, too often talented INFJs choose to keep their gifts wrapped up and hidden even though they have much to contribute. But INFJs would benefit by cultivating friendly relationships with extraverted people whenever possible. Opposites attract, and there is no doubt that being around more naturally open and communicative people can help bring INFJs out of their shells and out into the world where others can benefit from their intellect, empathy and compassion. 

Slow down! INFJs are productive and effective when they make a concerted effort to focus on one project at a time. But their fertile imaginations frequently undermine their efforts to stay on the straight and narrow, and they will often start new projects based on fresh inspirations before old ones are finished—and, before they know it, they will find themselves buried under an avalanche of work. There is really nothing INFJs can do to moderate the pace of their inspirations, but if they constantly remind themselves to slow down and take things one at a time, they may be able to resist the urge to go off on tangents at least some of the time. 

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Comments

Guest (not verified) says...

I took this test about 15 years ago and I was INTP. At that time, INTP made sense, and years later INFJ seems to fit. Very interesting.

Guest (not verified) says...

It changes as you grow, and when u have more experiences in life, also u get to have different view of the world.

Guest (not verified) says...

I don't really agree. As a person, you are who you are. Our perception of ourselves becomes truer through experiences, thus at an early age we don' t really know who we are. The INFJ is the rarest among personality types apparently, thus looking at other people around us, we find it very difficult to understand where the hell we exactly fit in!

Guest (not verified) says...

I would agree that your result from this test could change over time. It is designed on the premise that questions are answered based on how the participant sees them self. This could most definitely change over time.

You can't expect the teenager who wishes to be a rockstar to see them self in the same light when they have grown older and decided to have a career or go to college or even just begin working.

Guest (not verified) says...

I have taken that test multiple times over the course of eight years and I have changed as a person a lot over time, but my results are always the same. My hobbies, my interests, and my career has changed but the core of who I am has not. I am interested in helping people but I have become jaded over time and then I read a little INFJ carton with the caption that read, The words I do not care are not in my dictionary, except when I am lying to myself. That made me think about what matters most to me and how being jaded does not change how much I really am a sensitive empathetic person. I am now deciding to go into social work. Thanks for sharing this article and thanks for listening to my mini rant. =)

Randal (not verified) says...

Conscientious social workers and honest cops get a free pass into heaven.

Guest (not verified) says...

When I first took this test 15-20 years ago I was an INFJ - but the N and S part were borderline (so I took it repeatedly to try to make sure and it was always Intuitive.) With this test they have me as an ISFJ and the list of occupation fits and unfits is perfectly me. I think I changed a bit.

GuestAly (not verified) says...

Me too. When I first took this test I was an INFJ, and that seemed to really fit me. Years later I've taken it again and test ISFJ. I've been at the same job for 14 years and it involves a lot of focus and attention to details. I think life has made me more "S" though back then I sure was an INFJ :)
I also realize there are other things about us that make us "us" - not every INFJ or ISFJ is the same, etc.
I've done Strength Finders and some of my top strengths (Connectedness, Developer, Individuation) tie in to the INFJ profile gifts.
We are all so fascinating!

Guest (not verified) says...

ARTICLES ARE BASED ON THE MOST COMMON CHARACTERISTICS AMONG INFJs FELLA. THIS DOESN'T DEFINE WHO WE REALLY ARE. HEHE

infj girlie (not verified) says...

YOU GO! hehe

LaurenKBM (not verified) says...

I've been an INFJ since I first took the test at around 14 years old, and I'm still an INFJ at 33. For what it's worth. I also knew I wanted to be a writer or artist when I was in elementary school. We can grow as people, but some things really are at the core of who we are. Maybe it's all that early-on ability to analyze self and others. I've been painfully self-aware my entire life. I know my abilities, my awkwardness. I often wish I had more blind spots. There's something to be said for blissful ignorance, but I feel like this is definitely not a quality of true INFJs. ;)

Kay (not verified) says...

I agree with you. 

Karen (not verified) says...

Yes! This is so accurate it hurts. I'm floundering a bit now though. What's your occupation now? Does it fit INFJs well?

ASelman (not verified) says...

I have one more semester left in nursing school and volunteer with hospice.  I have never been more fulfilled in my work.  There are tons of different types of nursing too from helping women have babies to pediatrics, general population, and long-term care or hospice.  And in all of these sects there are different layers of care intesity (medical-surgical/ immediate care/critical care,/transplant floors or cardiac).  It is very stimulating and those options are just the beginning!  I have truly found my calling in helping people as a nurse

LJanis (not verified) says...

Years ago when I took the test I thought I was an INFP. I began formally studying who I am at 15, and know myself better now that I've been with my husband for 27 yrs, raised my children, gone through my 1st Saturn Return, 1st Uranus Opposition (WOW!) and menopause.  Delivered in a torrid storm from the Universe during my Uranus O, I also actually understand the grand Game of life that we are all playing, and who is against who (it's probably not who you think because most people don't know). I deeply resonate with the INFJ archetype. "...wish I had more blind spots." I've spent some time in my life envying the ignorant bliss that comes with disorders like Down's Syndrome. But now I know enough to understand why all this deep insight is the best Gift I could have, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Liinu (not verified) says...

hey Llanis, i've been really into working out the larger scheme of things etc. for a little while now.... also very much into astrology and have seen some crazy stuff with Neptune hitting my rising sign etc.... what you mentioned about the Game of Life sounds really interesting.... would you mind elaborating what you meant by the 'who is against who' thing...?  would love to hear your take on things.... thanks xx

Lapearce22 (not verified) says...

First off, It is Down Syndrome not Down's Syndrome or Downs, and they are not ignorant.

While I understand that you most likely meant no harm in saying that, as a mom of a child with Down Syndrome, I am an advocate of making sure that people are aware of how they say things. 

People with Down Syndrome are not always happy. They experience all the emotions as others do, but yes, there is a blissful, non judgmental quality to their personalities that is easily admired, but can also be abused by others. 

So maybe next time just refer to the bliss as wonderful and not ignorant, because their ability to be loving, non judging, and living in the moment is purely beautiful. 

Guest (not verified) says...

https://www.vocabulary.com/dictionary/ignorance

Lapearce22, the word ignorance does not mean unintelligent.  We are all ignorant to one thing or another, since we are unaware of it.  

Shannon W. says...

I really enjoyed reading your comment, I felt I can really relate. I know I’m different, have been since I can remember. Besides being an INFJ;  I am a definite Empath, Senitive and very intuitive. For any interested in astrology I am also a Cancer and fit pretty perfectly as we are described, for what it’s worth anyway, if it’s all a bunch of hocus pocus, then it’s totally conciquence I fit the crab. It’s nice to find others that “ get you “ as many people think I’m pretty out there or a white witch , gypsy etc etc lol

Shannon W. says...

I really enjoyed reading your comment, I felt I can really relate. I know I’m different, have been since I can remember. Besides being an INFJ;  I am a definite Empath, Senitive and very intuitive. For any interested in astrology I am also a Cancer and fit pretty perfectly as we are described, for what it’s worth anyway, if it’s all a bunch of hocus pocus, then it’s totally conciquence I fit the crab. It’s nice to find others that “ get you “ as many people think I’m pretty out there or a white witch , gypsy etc etc lol

Guest (not verified) says...

make a social site for a community

Guest (not verified) says...

That would be awesome actually, maybe then we would feel less lonely.

Guest (not verified) says...

And boy does it get lonely

Guest (not verified) says...

agreed

Becky764 (not verified) says...

It is a lonely life because no one understands why or what you are trying to get them to see. I can plainly see what the problem is but if the person is not going to listen then whats a person to do but to start keeping their mouth shut. I am seen as unsympathetic sometimes and some say that I dont know their pain and what I am saying may work for someone else but not them. I find it very frustrating to see what I can see and then have no way to fix it or get my point across. I am recluse now. Live out in the woods with the wind and God. I am happy by myself or with another.

Guest (not verified) says...

Yeah; often times it's easy to get caught up in the wanting to tell them about their problems, and it becomes really hard to imagine what they would feel if I told them what I think of them. Which creates problems, because then they might get hurt and see me as insensitive and stuff.

draco (not verified) says...

Usually when I try to help someone that person may not understand what I'm trying to say or want to face reality. Many times I may as well be wrong or simply not quite get what the other person is truly feeling. Being an INFJ doesn't necessarily mean I am always right but we do learn from our mistakes just like any other person and assimilate what we feel that's important to us. I strive to become a better person every single day not that is always possible. Silence and solitude are my best counselors and until now I thought I was an outcast, but in truth that is the best way for me understand myself and try to grow beyond my mortal bounds. No one seems to understand my motives most of the time and some think that I need medical attention. Why? Why should I feel that I am so different that I actually need drugs to put myself straight? I've always felt different no matter where I go or to whomever I talk to but is it a bad thing? I went through hell at school since I never found any girlfriend, even now with 30 years old people love to throw shit in my face because of that but who are them to judge? Who am I to judge what is wrong or right to someone else's? People like to tell me what I should do about that but, what if that isn't what I'm looking for? Can't I believe in something that doesn't make sense to others or should I join them in mediocrity? A relationship for me isn't just being married or having a kid, it goes way beyond the mortal coils. I do not care about external beauty but beauty coming for the inside. Truth above all else and devotion from both sides is what I believe in, but sometimes, I seem to be the only one thinking this way. If anything else, you should believe in yourself and stand by your principles, even if other people disagree with you.

Guest (not verified) says...

I totally understand what you're saying. Just... don't settle, okay? It's better to never marry than to settle for someone who doesn't fulfil your needs and make you feel as comfortable in who you are as when you're on your own. Life isn't all about romance and sex. There's so, so much more to it. INFJs have been given the gift of seeing that in our world, and it's amazing!!

draco (not verified) says...

If I were to settle for someone just to make these people who don't understand who I am happy, I would just be lying to myself, and especially to the other person. But in the end, I don't want to do that, mostly because I know that I wouldn't be able to give my everything to her since my life has been revolving around work and some other things. I don't really need or want to divert my attention from it. Especially knowing that having someone in your life takes a lot of your time and attention towards your partner.

To be honest, I prefer having a really good friend; someone you can talk to on a daily basis about things that are happening with your life and the sort, rather than someone to share my bed with. It's as simple as that, but throughout my life there has always been those who think that I'm just too afraid to approach a woman and "get laid" because that seems to be the epiphany of what it means to be a man for some reason. Even if in the end, that act would feel empty to me. But this is the society we live in so what can I do other than making my point clear to those who think they are better than me just because they are married or with someone? I used to avoid even talking to these people, but right now, I even laugh in their face for their stupidity and narrow-mindedness.

Guest (not verified) says...

hey

I just realised that i am not crazy, i feel exctly the same way.

you just made my day.

draco (not verified) says...

Haha! :) It's nice to know that my input on this matter may have helped you out in some way.

At some point I thought that I was crazy for thinking this way as well. Society will criticize anyone that deviates from the standards, but even those who consider themselves to be in the "standard" group, have their share of headaches as well.

I don't really care what others may think of me because, in the end, I'm the one in control of my own life, and that's how it should be. Don't let others control your feelings, just stay true to yourself and don't make any rash decisions when it comes to love. You may get hurt pretty bad in the process. It happened to me before and it was tough to get through it...

Guest (not verified) says...

I'm sorry it was hard, I understand too

Outsider (not verified) says...

This might seem like oversimplifying but, when it's right, it's right. You'll know when it's right and you won't have to worry about your life revolving around work or other things. You will make the time and other changes in your life to accommodate the relationship. The funny thing is that you will do it happily and enjoy the changes you make to do it which, for me, were exciting because I don't typically jump to make major changes. All you can hope for is that when you find the right person is that you are also the right person for them. Sometimes that all just comes down to timing in your life and theirs. For me it did not work out but, looking back, I don't dwell negatively on the fact that it didn't work. Instead choose to appreciate the experience that I didn't think was possible and feel the way I felt. I learned a lot about myself and now know that it can happen. Taking this personality test and information on my results certainly makes me feel better about feeling like I don't fit in. I've always got along with all different types of groups when I was younger in school but never felt like I... had a solid place in any of them. Kind of a great thing in one way but not so easy on the head?

Bubblezz (not verified) says...

You hit the nail right on the head for me. I to do not have a problem falling in love but I do have a difficult time connecting to the "right" people. I usually fall in love with a person that doesn't really get me but loves me and tries hard to understand. I love him so much so I end up doing way too much and feel slightly resentful when the same effort isn't returned. I see certain things in him that he doesn't and most times I end up right in the end which astonishes him at times. I do not have issues getting friends but I to do have a difficult time staying close to most over time. I can see how this is the the most rare personality type. Reading these comments really gave me a warm comfort inside. I wonder if there are in person meetings for this?? That would be pretty cool. 

Phonenix (not verified) says...

I can really identify with you and Draco. This personality type can be a blessing and a curse. I’ve settled into my solitude and often summerge myself in meaningful things that brings me joy. I have come to even enjoy spontaneity, whether with others or by myself. 

bobby boshay (not verified) says...

silena

 

SCR (not verified) says...

mag flashlight

reikirach (not verified) says...

I really related to your post, I feel like an alien most of the time in relationships. No one has ever really 'got me' and relationships have been very difficult for me. I just can't seem to find happiness within because I'm so complex to most of the guys I've been with. Way too deep I've been told!!!  Actually I can relate to most of the posts and it's nice to know I'm not the only one... It makes me feel like I'm destined to be with someone who will never truly understand me. I have a great guy in my life but he does not understand me most of the time. I was starting to think I'm going crazy.

 

Thanks for all of the posts it makes me feel like I'm not alone in this world....I actually came here to see what the best career would be for my personality type seeing as I've just been made redundant and not been happy in any of my previous careers. I have always been naturally guided to counselling/life coaching/networking etc but have not had the self confidence to pursue it, even though most of my family and close friends say I would make a great counsellor. 

 

Samantha Sarah (not verified) says...

reikirach, no you arent alone.   It must be possible as I found someone.  I have to tell you the shock to relatively recently discover just how well my husband knew me. Mostly :)  I think sometimes he doesnt know "what to do with me". 

 Frustratingly, I  spent years assuming that becasue he did  not relish the depth at which I enjoy diving ALL THE TIME  that  he wasnt as deep as I thought.   I was sooooo wrong.  I completely understimated him and I suspect many other people.   I must admit that Our points of connection are not as organic and as frequent as I wish but so much better than our earlier years.  

 I read somewhere else that for the people that are worth the concession , which he is, that we must learn to meet people half way.....is that settling?  ..my jury is still meeting.   

I have noticed a direct conection between my growth and awareness and my ability to recognise things in others I couldnt see before.  Appreciate before.  A spoonful of humility every now and then doesnt hurt.   

  Obviously Im here taking a refresher course on who I really am and am SUPER grateful for the few that I am able to connect with even if its for a short time. 

Been practicing gratitude like a religion. 

Its helping a lot.   

And Meditating on the fact that we are ALL connected on an energy level has also brought me much comfort.  Thats been a beautiful discovery.   The journey to self continues.  And also like you, I have had an inkling toward counselling/life coaching for sometime but was unwilling to pursue.  Things are changing all the time. 

 Take heart.  Be encouraged. 

reikirach (not verified) says...

Thanks Samantha, I can relate to your post for sure. My poor partner must feel completely lost when it comes to my depth. He is an ENFJ but he has no desire to have deep conversations about life like I do, and it has become quite an issue for me because I NEED to... I’ve had some big expectations of him that he just can’t live up to so I’m going to give him a break and attract my tribe of people to have those conversations with instead.

I’m really coming into full acceptance of who I am which has only taken 47 years lol... but better late than never hey... I’ve been on a spiritual journey for over 20 years and I’ve learned a lot and I’m very grateful for it all... I also find meditation helps and just being still... if I don’t get that time to myself I become very worn out. 

Its such a relief to know I’m not the only one out there who feels like this.... it helps me feel so much more connected... 

 

I am pursuing the life coaching route myself, I’m doing a course at the moment but I think my clients will be less main stream and more connected to discovering their life purpose and who they are and then taking the steps that could lead them down the road they truly want to go....it’s so inspiring and empowering watching that and if I can help even just a little I feel blessed.

You should pursue it if you feel inclined or explore it a little more maybe 😉

Rach

Samantha Sarah says...

 Rach, I'm almost 47 too!!!!!!!!! Like you I've felt the frustration of "it taking so long to get here" but ironically the only reason things are cracking open I believe is because I was "pushed" off the hamster wheel to enlightenment. 🙄😊

 

  Re: Building your tribe. I want in!!!

 

 I know that feeling of wanting what you want, in a partner,  But being FORCED outside your shell to get what we need!!  Lmao!!! Isn't that ironic? Under no other circumstances really. For me anyway. 

 

About your clients not being main stream : that is eerily similar to something a dear friend just said to me three days ago about who my clients will be. 

 

You just posted three weeks ago that you were thinking about counselling? 

 

How did you choose a life coaching course so fast? Do you like it so far? What's it called?

 

Nice to meet you!!!

 

Sam

reikirach (not verified) says...

Lovely to meet you Sam 😊 

it’s soooo good to know I’m not crazy and other people can relate... this site has helped me not feel so alone. 

Im just in the process of creating the group, I’m trying to think of a name... I originally came up with abundant blessing (blessing being a group of unicorns) and seeing as INFJ’s are the rarest group I found that fitting but as usual I always second guess myself lol.. 

You can find me here on Facebook (I hope I’m allowed to post here) if not my name on fb is Rachael Lee J

I would love to have you in my group.... where are you located? 

https://m.facebook.com/rachael.lee.79677

Thanks

Rach

Samantha Sarah says...

Awesome Rach!!  I'm in Nassau in the Bahamas! 

I don't think the name of the group is as important for the moment as the fact you just create it. I struggle with starting often  but it's in 'just doing it' that a natural way forward usually presents itself. And Anyway, a name can always be changed.😉 

Finding you on Fb now!!!💃💃

draco (not verified) says...

That is true. I will indeed feel when the time is right for love, and I will as well, involuntarily, make the time to be with the one I love. I was in that situation once, and believe me, I changed drastically during that time because I felt I had met the one woman that was meant for me. Turns out she wasn't, and looking back, I learned a lot from that experience; especially how you can be played by someone else when you dive deep into a one-sided relationship.

 

My defenses were pretty weak at the time, because of a depression that had settled in some time before that. I was desperately looking for some comfort; someone to lighten up the way for me, as the path I was walking in was dark and grim. She accidentally did that for me, and from a simple conversation, I began to like her. You know, it’s pretty easy to mistake an illusion for the one you want to be with— someone you picture in your head that doesn’t actually exist. I clung so hard to this illusion that even after discovering she was simply playing with me, I didn’t want to let go. It’s silly to even think this actually happened to me, especially after so many years and so many changes in my life…

 

To be honest, I haven’t completely discarded the possibility of falling in love again, but I won’t let myself be toyed with to this point ever again. Also, seeing that I’m not actively looking for a woman to share my life with right now, it will make the process even slower. If it happens, it happens, but I prefer my solitude and clear mindedness from all of the issues involved with a romance over anything else at the moment.

 

You see, I believe that we, the INFJ, are drawn to other people with the same mindset. So even if you get along with someone from another group, there will always be something that will bother you about that person. It can be something pretty insignificant but that feeling will nag you constantly, and you will eventually distance yourself. This happens a lot to me, especially when I see something about that person that isn’t quite right in my book. A group of people can be far worse in this respect, and these are always the first I usually jump out the fastest.

 

I don’t know about you, but I’ve embraced my solitude, and I hardly need a reason to move away from it. Also, sorry for answering like an year after or so… : (

vlouise (not verified) says...

Hi, I just read most of this conversation- I can't tell if I am an INFP or an INFJ. When I took the test 25 years ago I was an INFP. But anyway- I relate A LOT to what y'all are saying. I'm going to a therapist and saw her yesterday. Only seen her 6 times (6 months), but I feel like I am beating myself against a rock and I wonder what personality type she is. I take things very personally and I try not to. I'm trying to understaqnd myself within the walls of my own personality and not try to be so flexible that I lose myself. I often feel misunderstood and alone. Never been married because I won't settle. I would just be miserable with the wrong person and since I wear my heart on my sleeve, I know the other person would be miserable too. It's to read all of the conversation and feel like, yeah- I understand you because I feel the same way. Take care.

Laurie Smith (not verified) says...

I married an INFJ and am only one letter apart from him. He has many great qualities I love, as well as some qualities I detest. The part I detest the most is his secretiveness; I learned some things about his past that infuriated me, and became very sorry I married him and would not do it again. Because of his closed personality and being overly sensitive, it would be too disruptive, especially after 50 years, to get him to open up and talk honestly about it. What I would give to go back in time - I would avoid marriage completely because to me, it's not worth the work, heartache, and his cluttered mess he makes in every room! His good points just don't make up for these things. While I'm tired of pretending, I have no choice at this point. Sorry for the sad rant; besides this, I would be a free and happy person - I'm not the negative shrew this probably sounds like, ha!

Ela (not verified) says...

The sooner you understand it’s an illusion the better. Mine drained me for 5 years. Could never imagine I would almost volunteerely do so much damage to myself. Thank you life for your lesson 👌🏼

Hermione (not verified) says...

I feel as if there is no one out there that feels the same way as we do. As individuals there would be a difference in thought process among us all, but due to the fact that we are all human, our central morals and understanding of right and wrong is usually somewhat alike. Everywhere, you see prime examples of people that HAVE achieved something that impacts the world in some way. There's so much pressure to BE something because there is no point in living if nothing can be done or achieved. There are countless problems sitting there, rotting, getting worse as we humans ignore the fact that they exist solely because the term fear exists. I understand that you feel the need to improve, because I too, feel the same way. We are loners and it's been that way for so long, that if changed, would be unnatural. What you're looking for is there. It's in you, because you are the beautiful that you're looking for inside.

draco (not verified) says...

Throughout my life I met vastly different people and I usually like to play a little game of "test your personality and values", usually on a complete innocent conversation not to make it too obvious to them. From what I've seen and heard, their definition of right or wrong can differ vastly from my own on many, many levels. Some believe that stealing is wrong, but they can't resist the urge to do it despite knowing it's wrong. Same goes to other situations like, cheating on your partner, lying, hurting others emotionally or physically, the list goes on...

When I see such situations, I can't bring myself to just accept what's going on in front of my eyes because "it's how it's supposed to be". I've seen so much injustice in my life that I really don't care if I get in trouble by expressing myself about it. Some people are worse than monsters, and I like to let them know about it.

If we want to make a difference, we have to start with the people that surrounds us every single day like family, schoolmates or workmates. I'm a loner at heart and I do need to be one because that's who I am, but being part of the human society, makes us deal with other people even if we don't want to. Some will respect you and help you out of the goodness of their heart, while others will simply try to take advantage of you especially if your will is weak to try and defend yourself. But as long as I live, I won't allow injustices like this to happen without fighting them to the best of my abilities. It may seem like I'm a contentious person, but it couldn't be further from the truth because I don't like arguments, but sometimes we just have to act, rather than just being a spectator in something that makes you sick in the stomach.

Pristine (not verified) says...

Man can I relate here. I often feel like a square peg trying to fit into a round hole. It actually amazes me how people can be so contradicting. Because of all of my experiences, as a rule, I don't trust people. Thank God I do have those I do trust, even though it's a very small number (I can't count on one hand). Me, I pride myself on being honest and the few times I have had to lie, man it hurts. Besides, I am terrible at lying. So what I've learned to do is to basically keep my mouth shut.

For me, I just try to make a difference by just being myself and treat others how I want to be treated. Now if I only I could use these traits of mind and find a good job that suits because that's been my biggest struggle.

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