I am an ENTJ woman and have a question for other ENTJs, especially women, out there. Do you ever have times when you get extremely emotional - so much so that you are a mess haha lol - even when you are trying like everything to hold the emotions back? There are times where I am so frustrated, have pent up anxiety, or am so passionate about something that I start to falter and get emotional and then I can't be as strong, put together, or professional as I want to be. Have you had this happen? If so, what was the overwhelming feeling leading to the emotions and how did you keep yourself under control, recover composure, react, and address it to others? Thx so much!

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Guest (not verified) says...

Someone should respond

gabrielagrajeda says...

That is very good question. I had this happened before. I usually keep it to myself. Sometimes I would go to a place where there is noone around. And try to think positive in life.

Guest (not verified) says...

Yes. This happens to me when I am completely emotionally and physically drained. It takes a week or so to get over it. Being social and having intellectual conversations helps. This most recently happened to me after volunteering to be a wedding planner for a best friend. I worked my butt off, was not even a bridesmaid, and am single. When the day was over (it went flawlessly of course) I felt that I completely melted. My emotions took over and I was a mess. I escaped and left the reception. It only really felt like I was healed after she thanked me for all of my hard work.

queenbeestefani says...

Ha wow did I write this when I wasn't looking? I'm an ENTJ woman as well, I know exactly what you are talking about. Truthfully people like us are always the ones holding everything together, especially for those around us. We can't be "the commander" if we are always following our emotions like the fruit loops toucan. Although this is a big source of our strength it can also turn into a ticking time bomb of emotions. The trick is to find a source of relief, or outlet for these build ups. I like to keep a journal (also a great tool for "inner organization" which is heaven to the typical ENTJ), do yoga, and currently looking to take some hip hop dance classes. It's really important to make it a habit. I had an episode the other day where I went berserk over differences of opinions, NOT like me at all. I too have to remember. It's also important to have someone or a group you can vent about life with. Close friends, your partner, and family. Well, hope this helped anyone reading it. :)

Robert Hempaz (not verified) says...

If you possess a corresponding high level of control, then you will be able to mitigate the strong level of 'faith' that you are experiencing. Stay cool, stay in the moment. Just do now what has to be done. Your expert plan is drawn. Simply follow it!

stades says...

I don't consider myself emotional, but this post resonated as of late. I have a huge network, professionally & socially, & recently as everything in my life got a little more overwhelming than normal. I realized, WHO DO I TALK TO? Everyone comes to me to logically talk things out, & everyone assumes I have my shet together. I feel like I'd be letting them down if I tried to be vulnerable & lay it all out there for them to try to solve (or at the very least just vent to). Luckily yes, being social; cracking jokes & having stimulated conversation has helped tremendously, but it still sucks to feel like you have to be the one who has it all figured out. Prior to this current realization (of who do I talk to?), my go to coping mechanism was talking out concepts & ideas with others & stretegically integrating my own obstacles within conversations & see what people's take on them would be. Waaay better than forcing ppl to listen to your issues, when we can just talk in the abstract or hypotheticals (so fun to see how ppl think, too). Also, in contrast, deep thought in nature always use to help me. Now that my situation is a little more intense, I'll probably be taking on yoga, in addition to more sex, & perhaps psychedelics when I finally get the chance haha. In the pursuit of perspective, clarity, & understanding in everything I do ;]

Holly Muscles (not verified) says...

I find that physical activity helps. Working out really helps. I also have been known to go into the walk in cooler and scream because it's almost sound proof. For me it comes from the need to do and not being able to do because of the inefficiencies of the system or for other people to see that my way will work :) . So I do something. Break down cardboard boxes by the recycling bin, work out really hard, organize something that needs it, anything. A friend of mine says me doing something, takes the edge of need and then I'm still as passionate it's just I can focus. But I agree with everyone else in finding an outlet for the energy. Hope this was helpful.

SandyO (not verified) says...

I am an ENTJ Woman and find that at work mostly,when I am prevented from being in my element, that is being creative and visionary, I reach a point where I have difficulty in keeping my emotions in check. It is just happens; the situation can be very benign, yet something makes me tear up and feel out of control. For others who know me it is concerning because it is not my usual response to adversity. Usually I just find a way to work around obstacles and usually am very successful. But when the obstacles are superiors who have the power to undermine and what was previously celebrated and encouraged by my corporation as being creative and progressive, I don't manage very well emotionally. I have finally come to the realization that I really need to be in consulting and in business for myself. I need to find the right situation to embrace my qualities and not let the agendas of others make such an impact upon me. Not that my Feeling and Sensing parts couldn't use some work.....

NoBoxesPlease (not verified) says...

Hi Entj woman here as well. This was my entire last year. I think it's definitely a response to being stifled and realizing that we can't move to a solution space. One of my friends called it petulant child mode but really it's our response to our lack of control over the situation. I also think our natural ability to lead especially if our careers aren't feeding us the way we need forces us to look at other areas to conquer. Inadvertently if we do this without conscience thought we can get overwhelmed and bam! Emotional outbursts. In every ENTJ personality breakdown it speaks a lot on our inferior feeling and sensing that if unaddressed leads us to lose focus, direction and most of all control of our emotions. We get outwardly angry and usually destructive. Also we don't like living in the feelings sphere so when others and life forces us to be there for long periods of time we tend to do poorly. Then here comes the shame at not being our usually put together and amazing selves.

Returning from it depends on how long you had to live in that sphere and how much control you had to change it or walk away. What I learned out of it was inner circle support systems are a necessity and so is that inner self planning time. Exercise can also help but really it's having the ability to tap into your feelings side and get it to cooperate with the extroverted thinking and intuition--which tends to get murdered when our feelings are out of wack. Once the feelings are back in check, it's amazing how intuition turns back on, sensory goes back to its neutral state and extroverted thinking drives you again.

Professionally, I'm noticing when our traits are not sought after and when we can't have roles of leadership whether it's in a project or formal, we have to leave. It's horror on our psyche to watch inefficiency, lack of vision, and the promotion of people who have traits like that and we have to sit on the side lines because people don't realize it's your strength to be a strategic planner, organizer and leader of people. Especially as a woman--it's extra rough. Hang in there fellow ENTJ women!!!

Guest (not verified) says...

Yes! I am an ENTJ woman and sometimes, especially when I have been overwhelmed, not getting enough sleep, etc., I can get frustrated and become strangely over-emotional.

Marissa Wood (not verified) says...

Hi I am an ENTJ and I've done lot's of research on the personality. These reactions are normal for ENTJs under stress. We don't deal well with emotions because we want to be logical and so we push them down. The problem is we never learn to deal with them. We also feel very deeply even though we'll never admit it. We try so hard to be logical that we forget we need to be healthy. It's like we want to be efficient machines but we can't be since we are human.

I've found that I'm most emotional when I am home. When you meet me away from my home, you probably would say you'd never met a more charismatic professional person. But my family doesn't know me as that. Because they put a lot of stress on me when I was younger (and everybody knows as an ENTJ I was already putting myself through enough stress), I acted very uncharacteristically. I've gotten better but I still have problems with either holing myself up in my room or having emotional outbursts. As an ENTJ you will be putting yourself through enough stress by beating yourself up and being painfully aware of your flaws. You spend hours looking inward trying to see what's wrong so you can fix it. You need an atmosphere that will build you up and recognize you already put yourself through enough stress.

I have learned that if I want to stay away from emotional outbursts. I need to be aware of my environment and try to stay positive even though I am more inclined to see the negative. I try to surround myself with loyal friends who give wise advice and help me to stay this way. I also like to make sure I get out of my room and go hangout with these friends because if I get cooped up for too long I go stir crazy.

As to the emotions leading up to them, I would call it more of a thought process and it normally for me takes about three days to build up to the explosion. At first I'm not aware of it but as the days and then hours pass I feel it. I feel myself repressing this big wave I don't know if it's anger sadness or what it is, it's like a wave. My words become more negative and sarcastic. Every time something comes out of my mouth I feel my sentimental side say that's not right and then this feeling of guilt gets added to the wave. As this is gong on the continuous thoughts of "don't let yourself feel" and "be a terminator" and things similar to this start happening. Another thing I'd like to add is that I to myself deny the fact that the wave exists. Then finally something triggers it.

I have learned to stop this from happening I either need to address the problem (stop procrastinating) or go out and have fun with my friends because sometimes these emotions are caused by my starting to view only the negative in myself. It's very important to learn to stay positive because finding perfections doesn't mean you have to be depressed.

SusanaX (not verified) says...

I do appreciate the information shared here. So valuable for me. I have had emotional breakdowns lately..that I experience by myself..and I just overwhelm people by email..who mostly say that I don´t make sense because I dont share at the time things happen..I let them accrue until I can not handle them..getting anxious and overwhelmed.

 The more I spend by myself ..the bigger I feel voids and problems. I need to be out and be as social as I can. As I grow older..I have become pickier with people..more J. I have to learn to cope with emotios at the time they happen and not let them overpower me later.

Edge2070 says...

I personally like ENTJ women.

Janne (not verified) says...

ENTJ women here with a Highly emotional stepdaughter and mother in law stepdaugher is 21 and mother in law is 82 both are emotional and self centered only concerned with their wellbeing have given solutions to their various problems but never good enough and always reverting back to doing really stupid stuff making me extremely frustrated and grumpy (emotional a lot of the time as they my stepdaughter and her non contributing boyfriend are currently living with us and my  high strung mother in law are mostly by us grrrrrrr)  have put my foot down and said enough is enough get going on your own lives as I've given solutions but they don't want to take them so over it already now I'm emotionally drained . Know it will get better once they're not  so in my face any longer. Can't wait doing sport and going out with friends who also do my sport,  helps me staying active and social cheers me up coz starting to get WHINY myself and HATE that uuuuuugh, going to drag everyone kicking and screaming to a better future for us all wether they realize it or not done and dusted.

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