Hey all...

32 year old female INTJ.  Diagnosed with Major Depression Disorder, and I feel trapped in my head constantly.  Not a big people person and I feel as if I'm a cynic about everything. Do these feelings ever go away? I'm constantly searching for meaning in life, and can't stand American society and the monotony of every day. I'm bored constantly. Is this normal for us, or am I alone in this as well?

 

 

Comments

Nick W (not verified) says...

You're not alone. Fellow INTJ here, I think 32 is a critical point in life where you're looking for answers but just can't seem to find the right one. It'll be rough for awhile but keep going and things will turn out right. Just never give up.

Em (not verified) says...

I hear you! Same here f/28/INTJ... What are your hobbies? I was in a similar place not too long ago. I am now exploring things to break up the monotony of everyday life. I don't think the feelings go away entirely... What helps is how we manage them. I felt a strong need to comment after your post and I'm not one to reach out. But if you would like to discuss things further,  I'm all ears! ***********@gmail.com 

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Guest (not verified) says...

You're not alone. I have felt much the same way my entire life. You may want to consider finding an outlet for your energy, meaning something to give you relief from what is in your head. You can't escape your thoughts but you can learn to channel them into a more positive vibe. Best of luck to you.

 

Risika says...

24 year old female INTJ

Hey, you're not alone. I don't know if its normal but it is something that I'm going through as well. I just am trying to give myself goals so that at least I'm working towards something, even if it's not a major jump in life.

ARGsst (not verified) says...

INTJ here. I get that way sometimes, too. The key is getting out of your head. I find that sunshine and exercise really work wonders for me. Simple solutions for a complex problem, but they work.

AGris (not verified) says...

Accept that you have almost no control over many things in life (society, politics, environment, economy, etc.). Just focus on doing what you personally can do to improve the things you do have control over. Ignore the rest. This will cut out huge swaths of things you used to worry about.

Alexandra (not verified) says...

I'm 51 and have/had the same problems. The depression has left me years ago. Train yourself to think more positive thoughts and try to find solutions to the world's problems. I still find the whole life process pretty meaningless, but are happy to be a part of it. What helped me a lot was having children, but of course this is not the solution. There must be a desire to have children. Biggest advice is to train your mind to positive thoughts and find subjects that you are interested in. I like reading about quantum physics, back packing and hiking, swimming and spinning. Find friends that are fairly simular (try some europeans ;) .

Debbie says...

As a 57 year old INTJ, I have spent a lot of time in my head analyzing everything I do and say. Now that I understand this is normal in the INTJ, I no longer view this as a mental problem as I used to do. I spent a great part of my life beating myself up for things I said and did that did not fit society's prescribed order of how things should be done and replayed things over and over in an effort to do better the next time. I have learned to Not take this negative view any longer, but give it a positive spin. I have come to realize that INTJ's naturally want to improve everything, even ourselves. However, we must keep a balance and lighten up a bit. It is OK and even healthy to improve one's self, but unhealthy to take this to the extreme of tearing one's self apart. A positive spin has helped to reduce my bouts with depression. I also change things up a bit when I feel myself sinking into these lows spots. For example, when I realized I was spiraling down emotionally due to an empty nest, I began searching for a life raft to pull me to safety. In this particular situation, I enrolled in Community College. I engaged my mind and the energy I gained from stimulating the intellect brought me back to the surface where I could find balance and happiness. I hope this helps and I wish you the best!

Josh Cook (not verified) says...

Wow! Just wow really. This shit is so crazy.... it's like you all are me lol. Anyway, 32M and just minutes ago took a test to enlighten myself, on myself, and was spot on. I'm currently facing the worst bouts of depression given some serious physical, financial and relationship issues but i do see i light at the end of the tunnel and I hope I can just make it there to see it and the same for you all!!! Good luck and bless you all

Nuview (not verified) says...

So glad to have read comments that are so familiar.  I'm F/51 and praying that the roller coaster of depression and scary emotional breakdowns will stop. It's hit all areas of my life and I'm learning to function again.  It's true that nature helps. I've experienced it and picked up gardening as a hobby.  Another good channel is education, to occupy your mental space.  I'm returning to school with millennials to challenge myself 😜   In another world and another lifetime, I would wish for a separate school for us rare personality types.  It just makes sense.   If a future bout of depression return at least I have better coping mechanisms to deal with it.  I've learned to accept it as part of my makeup.  And the hardest part is getting my mojo/ interest/ motivation/ hope/drive back again.  I'm a work in progress 

jinxia (not verified) says...

oh ,i maybe a 28/f/intj  ,i have got a deep depression monthes ago ,in my own career plan and some emotion problems, that i began to think about my own personality,and finally i go to the hospital and take 8 times MECT。Now about a month passesd ,seems like i have back to my own life,it really works,what is more,i think socical connection and some well-known your character friends or even doctor can be really helps. And you may make some little goal what is based on your true heart.you can also take some sports like swimming ,riding bikes and so on.Since you know your personality kind, you may try to balance your perfact requirement and the reality.  I  do now put spirit balance and body health 

more importent level than work and other things,treat this balance first place helps you make other things the right way.

L Turner (not verified) says...

A lot of positivity posted. I'm not that positive. I've been clinically depressed for over 20 years. I question whether being INTJ contributed to my depression or my depression has contributed to being INTJ. When I'm at my very worse,  I have little to no tolerance for other people, or myself. I manage to go through the motions of being "normal". In fact, you would probably think I was very friendly and pleasant if you met me. But, it's like I'm acting in a soap opera...I can appear very interested in what someone is saying to me, nodding and smiling, all the while I haven't heard a word they've said. I use to be very smart, but my always hovering depression has lead to anxiety and difficulty concentrating. I like being different, being one of the very few INTJs, I think most INTJs do, just sometimes I think it would easier being something else.

Patrick Harvill (not verified) says...

INTJ-A male, strongly e and f for INTJ, so I feel your pain.  We plan. We need to plan and hit our goals.  Make a fitness plan. Execute.  Make a musical skills plan.  Execute.  Make a financial plan. Execute.  Save the world sharing IN insights on Twitter and Facebook.  Stay focused on achievable goals and execute.  Don't worry about gossiping and other things we hate.  Don't worry about what you cannot control, even organizational aspects that challenge INTJs.  Revel in INTJness.  Kick ass as an INTJ.  More INTJ not less.  Make the most of what time we yet may spend.  Plan and execute step by step.  You will be awesome. Eff 'em.

m says...

Hey : ). Hope you are feeling better by now. No you are not alone. I was diagnosed with depression- don't really want to know how severe- PTSD, being an ex=cop that is not surprising at all... The difference I find, for me, is that I do not like to be labelled. Too much BS in my opinion. If you say that you are depressed, than you are; if you choose to say that you are fighting depression doesn't it sound different?

 I have a job that is not really challenging- just carrying boxes around= and I have no idea of which direction to go in life; and that is quite daunting- and there is no happy pill for it. And yes, I am bored to death. It helps me a lot to read- it challenges my current way of thinking. And smile a lot, even if your smile looks sad. Someone said long ago that there is no greater sadness than not knowing how to smile.

I was accused of being cynical quite a few times and I just take it as a compliment- it requires intelligence: we do not live in a nice world, I can still see the best of it.

This doesn't work with everyone but since we all need to stay healthy, start a physical activity: that should help you with motivation and eventually will make you feel better about yourself, Anything... try dancing, and if it feels uncomfortable keep at it, do not give up straight away. For me it is martial arts, it keeps me focused and I let the negative energy go away during class (I am not meant to hurt anyone so I relax and enjoy some ligh-hearted physical contact). It doesn't keep me fit. It keeps me sane.

If you ask me if I fit in this world, my answer is no. And I say this with a smile. I wish you all the best. What you are going through is not easy, but it gets better. Finding answers is always the hardest thing for all of us 

 

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