Like with every personality type, INFPs have unique gifts – and challenges. Even a strength can become a liability if it’s not used properly. The trick is learning how to lean into your authentic traits and developing those that don’t come as easily, while being careful not to lean so far that you topple forward. 

How do you find that balance? 

It may help to develop some healthy habits. I promise this is not always a dirty word, though some INFPs may beg to differ!

#1: Use your voice

INFPs have a lot going on in their heads but they’re sometimes reticent about speaking out, or just forget to say what they’re thinking out loud. While there’s nothing wrong with being quiet, if you seldom say what’s on your mind, you won’t feel heard, people won’t know how much you have to offer, and it may hinder your relationships. Plus, your great ideas are worth sharing.

How to make it a habit:

Try to regularly express your thoughts out loud, even when they don’t seem that important. Practice around people you feel safe with. And while you likely prefer keeping in touch by text, try calling a close friend sometimes, to get used to using your voice, literally. Or read out loud when you’re alone.

#2: Get physical

You may spend so much time in your head that you get out of touch with the world around you or don't derive the pleasure and stress relief that comes from moving your body, getting outside, or simply enjoying the sensory world. Overthinking, without a counterbalance, can make our tendency to anxiety worse. And perhaps more than any other type, INFPs tend to dream about future possibilities and ruminate about the imperfections of the past so much that they forget to be present in the here and now. 

How to make it a habit:

Try regularly doing something in the physical world. It may be some kind of exercise or just getting outside and spending time in nature. Or combine both and take a walk outside. Leave your phone and earbuds at home, since the idea is to get out of your head and engage with the world around you.

Even just remembering to step away from the screen or your thought train and enjoy the taste of the food you're eating, really listen to your favorite music, or stop and smell the roses – literally – can help you use your senses as a source of grounding and enjoyment.

#3: Befriend clocks and calendars (a little)

As a windmill-tilting INFP firmly rooted in your values, you likely have plenty of (gentle) backbone, but does your day?

As Intuitive Perceivers, we bristle against too much structure. This is definitely not to suggest that you schedule every hour down to the minute. That would be a burden rather than a benefit to an INFP.

However, sometimes you can become so unstructured that the time gets away from you and you don't accomplish what you want to. Also, if there's no schedule at all, or nothing that you always do at about the same time each day, that leaves endless open-ended decisions which can be overwhelming for you.

How to make it a habit:

Put some of your other healthy habits into your schedule. For example, schedule to take a walk before lunch every day, or call a friend on Saturday afternoon. 

Also, decide what’s most important to you to accomplish each day and plan out a skeleton schedule to help you fit those things in before the time gets away from you.

The point is not to stop being your flexible self, but to consciously use your time the way you want to, without having to reinvent the wheel with every small decision.

#4: Book some time in your air castles

You’re probably always being told to stop dreaming and live in the “real world.” While accepting the way things currently are and learning to enjoy your time in that “reality” can be beneficial, it goes against your nature to give up dreaming of what could be. This won’t make you happy or successful.

Though your imaginative idealism can make life challenging at times, it can also be one of their best qualities when it moves you to try to make things better. Whether it’s simply allowing time for daydreaming, or putting together plans to make some of your dreams a reality, you’ll benefit from setting aside time to do what you do best. 

How to make it a habit:

Again, you can work this into some of your other habits. Let your mind soar to wherever it wants to go during your daily walk or workout. Set aside some free time on your new “schedule” to daydream to your heart’s content. Or make it a practice to do whatever feeds your imaginative, idealistic nature. Many INFPs thrive if they make time to practice an art form, do volunteer work, or otherwise use their creative talents and live their ideals. 

#5: Take action

You likely have an abundance of big dreams and inventive ideas. While you can’t act on all of them, you can take some kind of action, even if in a smaller way than you’d like. 

You’ll also enjoy your life more and be more respected by others if you do some of your living on the outside instead of just in your own mind. Taking even small actions can help you live a more fulfilling life.

How to make it a habit:

Make a list of a few things you’d really like to do, then break them down into smaller steps. By turning your vision into manageable steps you’ll see progress sooner and be less afraid to begin. 

For example, carve out fifteen minutes a day to work on your novel, market your side business or visit a shut-in neighbor. Once these small steps become a habit, you’ll find it easier to take bigger actions. In the meantime, you’ll feel a sense of accomplishment as you see what you’ve done, step by step.

#6: Practice self-compassion

With your natural empathy, you probably find it easy to be compassionate toward others. But sometimes it’s harder to be as kind to yourself. Add to that a tendency to perfectionism and others’ tendency to judge you for being “different,” and you need all the kindness and understanding you can get, especially from yourself.

How to make it a habit:

When you find yourself being self-critical, think about what you’d say to or do for someone else in the same situation, and show yourself that same consideration.

In conclusion

You can use your boundless imagination to think of other habits you might want to try to help you become the best, happiest, most balanced INFP you can. This is just a starting point. But above all, make sure that the habits serve you, rather than the other way around. You’re an INFP. You’ll have plenty of creative ideas for figuring it out – your way.

Diane Fanucchi
Diane Fanucchi is a freelance writer and Smart-Blogger certified content marketing writer. She lives on California’s central coast in a purple apartment. She reads, writes, walks, and eats dark chocolate whenever she can. A true INFP, she spends more time thinking about the way things should be than what others call the “real” world. You can visit her at or