Ok so obviosuly there's no tried and true way or place to find an INTJ, but I'm so irked by the idea that it's the only personality type I can be in a successful relationship with! Especially being the rarest type.. My last boyfriend was an INTJ, and our connection was nothing short of a fantasy for years. We didn't work out for reasons I've only recently come to understand. But he's long gone, and the past year has me wondering if I'll ever find another perfect match for me. I get approached and hit on a lot, but my immediate reaction to everyone is just.. disinterest. It takes such intensity for me to think a guy is worth it, and it constantly brings me back to the belief that they have to be this practically nonexistent personality type! (I'm an ENTP)

Comments

JustinJustin (not verified) says...

I'm right here, where are you?

Jay01 (not verified) says...

I'm a SBM, 53; Heavy-Set in Baltimore, MD.. INTJ it's very near impossible for me to find a relationship because of it. Good thing I was handsome when I was younger because I have my memories to reflect on. Not as handsome anymore, so, I maybe in a world of trouble with the ladies.

Burney says...

Dude, I'm a heavy, 53 y/o, INTJ. Your thoughts about it right now are your weak spot :-)  Also, unless you are addicted to over-eating (and/or other things), a  doctor at a weight loss clinic near you can discuss diet and prescribe an appetite suppresant (for less than I was spending at restaurants) while you replace or eleminate your top self-abuse habits -and the foods involved (LOL). Mine were typical: ice cream, soda, alcohol, ramen, frenchfries, and habit eating (big breakfasts, night snacks).  Replace them with near-zero versions, limit your dose (size and frequency). Oh, and think about insulin needles!  I believe you'll succeed when YOU DECIDE (Right?).You'll be amazed how much better you'll look and feel at just a 10% weight loss.  Good luck and stop telling yourself (and other people) you're not handsome! Get a new black shirt at 10lb lost, and a new haircut at 20lb lost, tell a couple women you plan to reward yourself with a manicure for losing 30 lbs...... ! Just thoughts; glad you posted! BP 

 

Guest (not verified) says...

I'm an INTJ man. You need to look online, otherwise your efforts will be mostly futile. OkCupid or someplace where you can use words to describe things is ideal. Bumble and Tinder are inherently superficial in nature and unproductive for INTJs. My advice is to try to work out who is an INTJ based on hobbies to the extent you can. Keep in mind that many of us may be nerdy in nature. Also, don't be so superficial when you're looking. If you're willing to date a guy who is of average height (for example) then your world will fill itself with a lot more opportunities.

BTW - Where can I meet an ENFP lady other than at a huge party where I'm unable to have a one-on-one interaction with her?

Kitt (not verified) says...

Can I get nerdy with you?

ENTP? I won't cry (like an ENTP) but I am greatly educated in the are of trivia and nerd'isum. I will awaken you.

INTJ-T (not verified) says...

I am a INTJ-T who accidently ran across a ENFP. Here's what happened. Mapping The Dating Minefield: How I tracked everyone in the conquest of love.

During that time, I kept matching with a girl (no matter the profile) Since the profile was using my real personality she was matching with the person behind the profile. Amused that this person was continusly connecting with a eye of the Illuminati, I sent her a real message, and we met in person. 
We have been dating for awile now, and I doubt it will end. 

however I'd like to make a point. Work on yourself first. Don't narrow down your search to one specific type of person or you might never find them. The numbers are against you. Instead, look for someone who works with you, has the same morals and is supportive. 
only then run the personality test. 

Then you will have met your match. 

 

Sigma (not verified) says...

The internet. Period. Pretty much every INTJ has a significant online presence, regardless of what they do "irl." And an INTJ in his element will be difficult to find in person. So as much as online dating sucks, it's your best chance of finding INTJ gems such as myself.

ENTP Chick (not verified) says...

Dating apps. Some guys (no, not all) will post their MBTI. And if you match, just try asking them. I just met an INTJ guy recently... the conversation was delightfully easy. He was very thoughtful and intelligent. ^_^ -entp chick

Elrond Half-Elven says...

If you want to find us, don’t go to social events. Try chess clubs, debate groups, hobbyist clubs, or online forums. Just my thoughts on likely areas.

Annonymous says...

I must say, anyone who answered this question with "I'm right here!" is either desperate, not an INTJ, or both.  An INTJ will usually be found alone or with very small crowds, debating with friends.  They will never approch you, as I'm sure you know, so if you even want to have a chance, you must approch first.  We will proboble be the one most excited in an argument when in a group or the silent one (Depends how comfortable and close we are to the group).  Try looking in book stores or a place where you can increase your knoledge.  Dating apps are an ok idea, but most INTJ's won't be on one because there is always a chance of false information, on top of going out to meet someone you don't know.

Fellow ENTP = Widen your scope to INFJs too (not verified) says...

I'm an ENTP too. My wife is an INFJ. You're right, it is seriously a match made in heaven. (Which is why I'm actually curious as to what happened between you and your INTJ? Would love to know the general details of what happened.)

I feel like INFJ is also one of the best matches out there for an ENTP, maybe even better than the INTJ. I'm the head, she's the heart. We're alike in the best ways, and different in the best ways.. She's my biggest fan and I stimulate her mind with interesting ideas and she's the warmth that Thinking often lacks but needs. She gets me, she admires me, she appreciates me, and I feel the same with her. 

My point is that I think you're dead on about this special conncetion you had with the INTJ, but I think that you will actually find this not JUST in INTJ but maybe even a MORE perfect match in an INFJ.

Please share with me what happened with you and the INTJ... I'm really intrigued by this. 

 

KV says...

I'm an ENTP (f) and my partner is an INTJ (m); I don't see the "ideal" in this match up that others do. I love him, don't get me wrong, and he is very supportive of me at whatever task I've taken on. We work well as a team when it comes to tackling problems and decision-making, but equally frustrate the Hell out of each other. I find myself laughing at his rigid approach to certain things. My argumentative and challanging nature irks him as well as my being comfortable going against norms. One of the things I love about him though is his strategic thinking; he is always two or three steps ahead of the game which has helped me hone my own strategic skills. 

graggle (not verified) says...

graggle 

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