I am an INFP, my boyfriend is an ENTP. I really want to help encourage him and show him that I really so care about him, and I want to do it as efficiently as I can! But I feel like in order to do so, I need to know what goes on in an ENTP's brain. What are some things I should or shouldn't do?

Thank you!

Comments

SarahENFP (not verified) says...

Honesty. Be forward with how you feel, but also be conscious of bogging down your bf with too many emotional issues. You have to approach conversations about feelings objectively as an intellectual conversation. Basically try not to get too F. His T makes it hard for him to understand.

Allison (ENTP) (not verified) says...

As an ENTP, I can tell you to definitely give him space! Personal freedom is a big deal for me, as well as avoiding people who are overly clingy or sensitive. Always always always engage him intellectually. Be spontaneous and adventurous! Most importantly, COMMUNICATE, especially if you are much more sensitive than him. A lot of times we ENTPs tend to hurt feelings without meaning to because we are not the most sensitive, but as long as you communicate, you will realize this. As for things you shouldn't do, do not try to control an ENTP and don't be boring!

BradN (not verified) says...

As a male ENTP, the two most important things to me are (1) having space when I need it (I need it a lot), and (2) open, forward communication.

The space thing can be the most difficult, because sometimes we need it at the least traditional moments. When things are going smoothly in my relationship, oddly enough, those are the times I often want some of my own personal time and space. When we want space it doesn't mean we necessarily have a problem with you (usually it doesn't for me). We just may need to re-charge and explore other things.

When people say we like honesty, it doesn't necessarily mean we hate lies (but that's part of it). It means we hate it when people beat around the bush with us. We get impatient, and we might even try to push the words out of your mouth for you. I hate to say it, but if you're not forward and open with him, he'll more than likely steamroll you. Don't be afraid of offering a different opinion or different perspective. He'll more than likely contest you, but, as hard as it may be for someone of your personality to understand, it's kind of his love language. He likes hashing things out with other people.

Also, there's a good chance he says a lot of bold and brash things to you. That's partially his way of testing you out, and seeing if he can get a reaction out of you. He's experimenting with your personality, testing your ideas, and trying to prod you to converse with him. One of the biggest misconceptions about us is that we are branded as "debaters". We don't so much thrive off of debates, as much as we just love flipping ideas on their head with other people, even though we tend to prod people a little too much, and I understand it can get obnoxious (especially for introverted feelers like yourself).

Overall, just remember, we're difficult in relationships. Some of us have found ways to be successful in them, but just remember "wandering" is in our nature, and committing to one thing is really darn hard. Just like any relationship, both parties have to bend, so be flexible. But also be assertive with your own wants and needs, and communicate those clearly. If you don't want to go somewhere or do something, but you don't tell him, he won't waste his time trying to feed off your emotional state and figure you out or read between the lines. He'll just go with his own decisions, and that's not healthy for any relationship. Bend. Be absurdly patient(if he's worth it), and be strong.

Hopefully that helps :)

Luis (not verified) says...

I'm also an ENTP. Quick pieces of advice:

- New challenges: New things, new activities, new hobbies, keep it coming. He'll enjoy the diversity and keep him occupied learning new things. This removes the pressure of you always being the entertainer and focal of his restless mind.
- Communication: He has the emotional understanding of a toaster. Be straight, clear in expressing your emotion and don't take it personal if he's too harsh in criticising. In his mind, that is the kindest thing to do, being objective and direct
- Force yourself t to mingle with him socially, even when it's with people he barely knows. He makes friends (connections) everywhere and constantly. He knows it's not your forte to meet new people all the time but will certainly appreciate the effort.

@Allison & Brand, feel free to discuss if these points resonate with you.

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