I don't really know my identity, but I sound like a ISFJ and I am not happy about that because I don't like crafts, cooking, gardening, and I don't like watching lots of movies but I do like supporting the ones I live on the things they like to do. I want to be an INFJ because I like intimate settings, hanging out with friends, reading, writing with inspiration, cultural events, listening to music, and cultural events. I'm not sure about appreciating art but I do love art because it's beautiful. I hate that this is how I feel because I want to love the person God made me to be. Also, I want to be different and make the world a better place with my "talent". How can I do that! How can I protect a church? All I want is a part time job with a $30,000 salary but a meaningful job. I want to be able to have a job that fits my values and my values is that I can change people's lives for the better in a Christian way but I do not want to face a lot of people and I don't want to go to college. I like to volunteer at my church because it makes me feel closer to God and I feel safer there because I feel I am supposed to be there but I don't know what I'm supposed to do. All I want to do is be reliable for the church, my future family, and my close friends. It's so important that I can know who I am and it's important what job I can fit in. I am twenty years old and I need to know where I am going. Someone please help me because I'm tired of this struggle!

Comments

INFJ1961 says...

Hi. What has you thinking that you sound like an ISFJ, if you don't like the things they typically like? In addition, it appears you like things that INFJs like.

adrianabonilla1996 says...

Because supposedly an INFJ can sense someone's feelings before the person the person knows themselves and I cannot do that but I can do is once I notice that they are hurting I really can really feel their hurt usually with some own I am close to. They say that they are good at complex stuff and I'm not good at that, and INFJs are good at solving someone's personal issues and I like to think I am good at helping people with their problems but I'm not. I just love to be there for people when they need someone and it's a great scarification when I was able to helpful to someone, especially to someone I love. Yet an ISFJ has good memory for details and facts while it took me three years two figure out my own best friends birthday. I believe I am an ISFJ I don't feel different anymore. My guy friend who I believe is an ISTJ points out how I'm a typical girl but he also said a lot of tiles that I am not good with being aware of my surroundings because we kind of argued about seatbelt and I told he had put it before which he clarified that he didn't. He is right that I do not pay attention to details but I can't help it. Anyways I get stuck between being an ISFJ and INFJ. I don't fully understand what it's like to be an INFJ. I've searched up videos on YouTube between the two and they make ISFJ sound like all they do is clean, take care of family, and are really hard workers and it's not that I don't love my family but I don't feel like I need to care for my family unless I have my own children, I hate cleaning, and I'm not hardworking but I can be when I really am into something. I saw an ISFJ and all she post is about health and that's not my interest. When I watched videos of INFJs I liked what I heard. They way they talk about themselves and other types, their interest are like mine, and I love how pqssionate they get when they know who they are (mostly the females). I can't remember what they said but I just remember feeling that I was finally at the right place and I know it sounds but that's the way I feel.

INFJ1961 says...

Have you actually taken a personality test? There is a very good one on this site. I ask you this because you haven't mentioned it yourself. You've only stated you sound like an ISFJ.

adrianabonilla1996 says...

Yes I took the test and the first time I took it said that I am an ISFP and I know for sure that I am not an ISFP. Since then I took the test to many times that I can make myself be any personality type I want to be. If that makes any sense.

Amylee.beck says...

No offense here but it sounds like maybe you're either not being totally truthful when you answer the questions on the test or you are over analyzing the questions to the point you're not giving most natural and un-influenced answer. I've never heard of anyone getting vastly different results when taking it multiple times. You may waiver between a few things. Such as between ISFJ or INFJ but not totally different types. For example, I tend to waiver between I/E and P/J but I'm always an NF. I am an INFP with strong leanings toward extraverted depending on what all is going on in my life and Judging(this can be seen in areas like organization and tidyness. I tend to be somewhat anal on keeping things neat and tidy which isn't a strong INFP trait.

The other thing to keep in mind is that you can't look too critically at the literal meaning of the descriptions and think it has to be an exact match point for point to still be a match. I took these quotes off of 16personalities.com : "ISFJs are true altruists, meeting kindness with kindness-in-excess and engaging the work and people they believe in with enthusiasm and generosity." "Combining the best of tradition and the desire to do good, ISFJs are found in lines of work with a sense of history behind them, such as medicine, academics and charitable social work." "ISFJs' ability to connect with others on an intimate level is unrivaled among Introverts, and the joy they experience in using those connections to maintain a supportive, happy family is a gift for everyone involved." You said, "All I want to do is be reliable for the church, my future family, and my close friends." Does that not sound like an ISFJ? A Defender?

I think you may need to look further at the ISFJ type and really understand the characteristics without assuming you have to be a 100% match for all of them. And keep in mind that we're all still individuals and our own unique life experiences and preferences have some influence over who we are as well. If you like certain qualities other types may have then that just gives you a personal goal and roadmap for self-development. Knowing your personality type is the first step. From there you have to understand how to leverage your strengths and work on your weaknesses.

Good luck!

INFJ1961 says...

I like what Amy101 has to say about all of this, but especially that in order to take the test and be any of the 16 types you want to be, then you're not being truthful to yourself. If you really feel that you are, perhaps you could have someone who knows you well and somewhat you trust to go through the questionnaire with you.

adrianabonilla1996 says...

That is why I'm so upset with myself because I know that I'm not being truthful to myself. I want to be truthful to myself because the bible says "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well" (Psalm 139:14). I'm supposed love myself the way God made me. Anyways I know I have to do more research about ISFJs because I don't really understand. Well I understand that they use the past a lot to help them solve a problem, how to live life, and how they get know people (mainly loved ones). Reason why I don't think I'm an ISFJ because I only use the past to make sense of my idea or ideas. But you are right I should ask a friend to help me with the test because it will be helpful since I am always myself to my friends. I think they know me better than myself. And thank you AMY101 I know that I am not supposed to take the reading literal but the people on YouTube does and they really confuse me and again. Thank you to INFJ1961 for being helpful.

INFJ1961 says...

You're quite welcome. Best wishes!

mp3artists says...

sounds like you might be a little bit in denial........why don't you do yourself a favor and cook yourself a REALLY GOOD dinner tonight.....throw away the diet BS and just eat what you love......all the way to a HUGE dessert.....live it up now and then...........stop worrying so much ....the fact that you CARE so much means you are a good person no matter how you deny it.........AND while you are at it......KNIT ME A SWEATER sweetie..........(just kidding) 8D !......do you have any pets ? they can really be good for GOOD people.....whatever you do GO FOR IT ! let yourself BE ....stop judging yourself and others.

adrianabonilla1996 says...

Thank you I know I should and I'm sorry for making it sound like I was judging anyone but I wasn't trying to. I wasn't trying to come out that way and I am really sorry if I offended anyone because I am not that kind of person.

adrianabonilla1996 says...

I have so much respect for everyone and I do love everyone. I know that everyone is unique and special in their own way. I was just trying I didn't feel like an ISFJ because they are very good people and are very hard worker and here I am not as kind but I am asking God to fix my heart. I look up to them to enclose they are hard workers and I should be doing the same.

milesmo13 says...

Forever19,
You sound genuine and sincere in your desire to know more about yourself, but more specifically your sense of identity and purpose in this world. True to both introverts and feeling types though is a strong sense of compassion and a desire to help others. I believe that your Christian faith has given you a strong enough foundation so that your purpose in life is validated in ways that you serve others. Have you by any chance taken the Personal Strengths Inventory by Martin Seligman that is also provided by this site? I believe that it would be of great help to you, and hopefully provide greater clarity to discovering your true giftings. Whatever, you decide, know that you are here to be a blessing.

I wouldn't be too concerned about validating your interests and hobbies based on the examples that Kiersey provides such as gardening and cooking. Hey, none of these apply to me. It just means that your personality type is more multi-faceted than can be described on a sheet of paper. Cheer up, we introverts can take ourselves way too seriously. ;)
Sincerely,
A fellow ISFJ

P.S. When I was first introduced to the Myers-Briggs (Kiersey temperament tests), I measured as an INFP. After becoming very analytical and critical about myself, the feeling aspect became weaker, and I was measured as an INTP, which wasn't truly me.

My last prior attempt, I measured an INFJ. Like yourself, however, as I became more strongly grounded in the Bible and in the Christian faith, intuition was replaced by sensing. This validates that I am an ISFJ.

adrianabonilla1996 says...

Thank you for your kind words. Yes the mbti can be very confusing but I think I got so worked up about my identity because I wanted to know why I do things the way I do for example "why am I so shy". I thought being shy is an introverted thing but no it isn't. Introverts are just private. Or like why do I have a mental illness? I used to think my depression and anxiety was part of my personality but it isn't. Lots of prayers and help from God and the people that loves me helped me figure out who I am. I also felt like my personality wasn't good enough so I got insecure because I wanted to be unique. There is no such thing as a better personality because we are all wonderful in our own ways and God loves us just the way we are. I definitely know that I am an ESFJ and for extrovert I am shy but I'm okay with that. Once I feel comfortable I let my colors shine. I love to smile at people and get a smile back. People's happiness is my happiness. I came a long way and I am proud of who I am and what God wants me to be because he will bless me. I am so glad to know who I am and learn a little bit about others because it helped me to be more open minded about others like my ISFJ best friend. We may have similar personalities but we are also very different. I learned a lot about her and she is truely great friend. I'm still trying to understand my other best friend. She sounds like an ISxJ more like ISTJ but I'm not a hundred percent sure. Little by little I gain new knowledge about my friend. This research about myself helped me gain understanding about others and understand what kind of guy I've been looking for since I was twelve years old. Lol its crazy to know that I still wait for the same qualities and its defiantly an ISFP man. I know one day God will provide when the time is right. Thank you again for sharing your kind words. I feel much better about myself and I accept each personality, well I'm trying because I still have that kind of thought of "this is how it supposed to go" because of knowledge of the past.

milesmo13 says...

You are welcome. For you my friend, may I recommend two valuable books which had helped me tremendously. They are written by a motivational Christian author named Bob Beaudine. His enthusiastic spirit is contagious to both introverts and extroverts. These two books are The Power of WHO and The 2 Chairs. They are useful tools that can assist you in being and staying connected to God and to the people around you. Blessings!

adrianabonilla1996 says...

They sound awesome. Thank you.

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