I worry that things I say that are logical and rational are hurtful.
e.g. I'm an INTJ woman in a relationship with an ENTJ guy, who used to be my best friend - we were very close and then lost contact for 9 years and decided to give it a go. we did LDR (long distance relationship) for 2 years and then he's moved in for a year. for about that time, we've not been having much NSFW action, much less than when it was LDR.
This makes me question the point of a relationship, as I had always kept sex and friendships separate until i tried to be with him, (as i felt that I could have emotional needs met by friends, and emotional intimacy with sexual partners made me uncomfortable). I've never been emotional about sex.
When i say this it hurts him, who hears that I don't love him and don't want to be with him, however I say it more as a question to the positioning of our relationship, that if he doesn't have an interest in sex or other NSFW activities, then we can redefine our relationship towards the emotional side, and I can explore physical relationships outside of this. I care about him, love our shared history and we 'get' each other, now we're just not having sex, which I have issues with. To him, this is not an option, as he doesn't separate the 2 ideas of intimacy and sex. this is impacting my desire to achieve shared future goals with him, e.g. marriage and home ownership, a pet, etc.
Am i being immature? if so, can someone explain the reasoning so i can overcome this idea and see the other side of this?
Have other INTJ's had similar relationship issues? Help!!