I'm liked and respected by my peers that are high-performers, but 'the rest' (I'm guessing that is an ENTJ indicator right there) find me difficult and demanding.

What tools/resources are out there to help me soften those rough edges for those who don't work well with my ENTJ personality? 


person who is a grill (not verified) says...

hmm well i dont have the best picture of your problem, but i would suggest that maybe most people think that you expect too much from them(maybe because you hold yourself with higher expectations), regardless of whether you are actually expecting to much or not, it could be that your approach intimidates them(like your confidence or assertiveness?), causing them to resent you(because they get jealous or feel undermined and therefore insecure). i would suggest that an allivating measure could be occasionally pointing out traits in those people that you admire or appriciate? or maybe saying occasionally a small monologue(like a small motivational speech?) before you start working with them where you highlight how you understand how difficult what you are asking can be early on and that you appriciate their efforts towards the overarching goal? if you could be more specific with what these people are finding difficult and demanding(like tone or approach?) then i could give you more specific advice.

overall it seems like some people are misunderstanding you behavior as being inherently condecending(i could be very wrong) but maybe what could help the most is trying to find a way to get across to them that you aknowledge them as individuals with strengths and weaknesses

hope this helps from an infj

Angus says...

All of my ENTJ life I have struggled to understand this: Just because I believe I am right doesn't mean I have to convince people they should do things my way. There are times when we ENTJs must go along with the group norms. I have learned to ask myself: Which is more important to me, the outcome or the relationships?

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